The way you do this, the only way to do this, is to stop contact with him. Stop it.
You don't call. You don't return his calls. You don't talk to him, you don't see him. If you do see him, it's in a public place. I say you should do it right now. You should not spend another day agonizing about this. Leave now. Start focusing on you.
The reason for this lack of contact is because with someone who is a gifted manipulator, they can get you doubting yourself quickly. He knows your buttons, he's happy to push them. You wouldn't let yourself go near a person who was threatening your physical health; well, this guy is threatening your self-esteem and your confidence in a similar way. You walk away from it. You don't look back. You don't answer emails, you *don't engage.*
If you engage, he'll get you.
It's hard. I know. It's so so so hard. You can do it, though. The first week will be the toughest. You talk to us. You make plans and you keep them with other people. You reach out and you'll find a sea of hands reaching back.
no subject
Date: 2003-10-16 02:59 pm (UTC)You don't call. You don't return his calls. You don't talk to him, you don't see him. If you do see him, it's in a public place. I say you should do it right now. You should not spend another day agonizing about this. Leave now. Start focusing on you.
The reason for this lack of contact is because with someone who is a gifted manipulator, they can get you doubting yourself quickly. He knows your buttons, he's happy to push them. You wouldn't let yourself go near a person who was threatening your physical health; well, this guy is threatening your self-esteem and your confidence in a similar way. You walk away from it. You don't look back. You don't answer emails, you *don't engage.*
If you engage, he'll get you.
It's hard. I know. It's so so so hard. You can do it, though. The first week will be the toughest. You talk to us. You make plans and you keep them with other people. You reach out and you'll find a sea of hands reaching back.
Love you. Be strong. Get out of this. Really.