sab

What appears to be an as-yet-unseeded SGA 2x14 -- anyone started/finished downloading a torrented version of this ep yet?

SGA 2x14 Torrentspy Page (opens to a page, not a right-click-save link) -- this is the Azureus/eztv XviD-TvD that is also listed on Mininova and says 0 seeders, 0 leechers atm. ETA: it's downloading, with no seeds, but .966 completed out there somewhere. Mine's coming in at about 16kBs and I'm crossing my fingers it'll speed up. Come on in, the torrent's fine!

I'm back from WBC, my second-to-last class. The script's due January 2nd. Apoplexy? Check.

But more importantly, today I received in the mail some fabulous Christmas gifts from two of my favorite brilliant and loveable aristocrats, maudelynn and Londo Mollari. Dan'a, I don't have the words to express the perfect awesomeness of this present. I've been jonesing for this book for about six months. Sit tight while I *read* the thing, and then squee even more appropriately and effectively about just how brilliant it is. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

And to the fandomcards tiny genius who channeled Londo, dammit, it's PERFECT. In fact, I'm confident Londo's got a stack of cards just like these, and a signature stamp, and a host of underpaid interns addressing and sending and swooning over his MAJESTY. Dude, what an awesome thing to get in the mail. If you're out there, somehow, reading this, and don't mind revealing yourself (is that okay, boniblithe?) I'd love to know who to thank even LOUDER... For now, thank you, Centauri Embassy, Office of the Prime Minister, for the greetings on this, the Universe's grandest holiday season.

Things I know about yesterday: Donnatella Moss didn't die. I learned that on AIM. Then I learned about denialcorp on AIM as far as SV's concerned, and I share the following: EVERYTHING'S FINE. Then I saw Angel and lots of people died, but since it was the APOCALYPSE and also most of them were demons I'm pretty sure that's not a spoiler. Seriously, it's not a spoiler, I'm just being cavalier about mortality.

And in that spirit, I give you raincitygirl's denialcakes LJ entry, full of distracting comedic links and Jon Stewart's commencement address at William & Mary College. The latter is really damned good.

*

I'm living in a place where I don't really have a participatory fandom; where my diversity is manifest as dilution, or the center cannot hold, something like that. Babylon 5's the deepest of my current wading pools, and, I say again, dude, any fandom where ff.net's the go-to fic archive (Enemies & Allies, being specialized, and having under 20 stories, not withstanding, of course) is a sorry state of affairs.

But B5's representing in a big way. There's a loud and energetic group of girls here on LJ, and over at t_m; folks like barkley and andrastewhite are watching the episodes anew and we're having character discussions and some fearsome debates. Totally not sneezing at the B5 fandom, of whose ranks I am proud to be a member: I love you all.

But I was thinking about the experience of fandom, of *a* fandom (rather than fannishness in general), and I do kinda miss being part of a big meaty one. For the purposes of this argument, "Big Fandom" describes a group of people who largely know one another's names and reputations, where there's BNFs and where people can be identified by writing style, where there's a dozen specialized fic archives and fan sites that people know by name or acronym, where there's flamewars and aggravation and community -- all around one specific show/book/medium.

Maybe LJ and the current tread toward polyfanism has created a dilution of the big-ass fandoms, but they're still around. You can see it in HP, for one thing, in SV, in the Buffy/Angelverse still, even. In the comicverse/Batverse/JL-verse too, at this point. And there's probably still folks participating in the West Wing fandom, though I don't know the state of it at the moment. CSI and Alias both seem to have considerable community followings. What else? Where's the Big Fandom, nowadays?

I had it last in Farscape, before that was WW, and to a degree in SN, though Sports Night never had the same kind of community feel as other Big Fandoms. Before that, of course, was XF, the One Big Fandom To Rule Them All, and before that, I had Trek, the One Big Fandom To Birth Them All.

Now -- I have B5, and we're the fannish equivalent of the kiddie table. We're trying our damndest, but at the end of the day, there's maybe a dozen of us total, t_m and ff.net. Jeremiah never got off the ground, though the Samwise and Markus fans are representing over on valhalla_sector like troopers. Band of Brothers will never be a fannishy fandom, because, oddly, we've got too much respect for it to take it to that loving/mocking place. camp_toccoa is an awesome community, and a great crowd, but, you know, not the same thing.

And then there's Firefly, which, as Punk commented when we were discussing this, is a side-dish fandom. Everyone's got a lump of Firefly on the side, next to their main-course Angel or HP or SV or Farscape. Firefly -- there's no there there, despite the fact that it surpasses, in sheer numbers, all three of my other fandoms combined.

So, what's the buzz? Am I alone in this? Are other folks noticing a fannish diaspora that's caused a dilution in the concept of Big Fandoms? And for you kids who are still in Big Fandoms -- where are they? HP, SV, Alias? How're they workin' out for you?

I'm just being a clearinghouse, for a moment, mostly so I only have one LJ link to Memory. Anyway, here's some stuff from the world:

[open-minded Jews in Portland who aren't gay]
[What, no hellfire? I was promised hellfire!]
[Gay mittens]
[B5 ficathon, um, super-gay]
[device of the future! maybe fantastic! In a sort of post-apocalyptic Big Brotheresque way. Or, maybe gay.]

That being said, I have another question. To the righties on my Trusted list, or, rather, the Righties whose opinions I trust:

Do you -- or any conservative-types in fandom you know -- have you, hm. The question is, do you know anyone who's comfortable with slash, writing it/reading it, while not comfortable with homosexuality as a practice in her real life? Someone who could write about Duncan and Methos getting it on, but who'd be squicked if she learned she had a gay friend?

Additionally -- how does this hold over for gay marriage? pene enlightened me on the subject once when, in her more Christian days (G, *g*), she commented that she "believed in" homosexuals ('cause, duh, there they are), but she didn't support pre-marital sex, THEREFORE, the option left to her was to support gay marriage.

Of course, this was before the big gay agenda, perpetuated by the liberal media elite, swept G off her feet with the use of porn and evil temptresses and, um, whiskey, probably, and made G supergay in that insidious way we have of taking otherwise innocent people and gayifying them while they're not looking. Poor unsuspecting pene. *g*

Anyway. I'm wondering how that holds over for conservatives not of the religious bent, wondering -- first, if there IS a set of slash writers who are uncomfortable with homosexuality in the "real world" but not in fiction, then -- why that is, exactly. And just, in general, wondering what people think. Responses from all sides welcomed, please and thank you.

as it turns out, I want all of Babylon 5 on VHS. Or DVD, that would be fine too. if you're out there, and you have these things, you ought to dub them for me. I will trade Aeryn's firstborn child -- speaking of which: read Pene's I Give You More Lives Than I Can Count. Even if you don't know Farscape. even if you don't care. Because it's beautiful, and perfect, and you will. Things about women, and love.

Because I'm thinking of this thing. I thought about it before. Jae will jump on it, I know, because I've read her stuff about Delenn. we'll talk more.

This thing, about Delenn, and Sheridan -- and Lennier too. this thing about being Chosen, about being the One. Together.

I mean, what's real life next to that? what's war next to that? And why, out here, does no one ever tell us that love brings peace?

I mean, seriously. How lucky are they?

(Tapes. DVDs. I have six episodes from season 2 and five episodes from season 3. Plus the Earth War twoparter. Not enough. Not enough. Really.)

oh- and. Come this weekend, I move back in with my parents. Into the basement, no less, in case we ever thought I wasn't a geek. I need to save money, squirrel away several grand so I can move, this summer, back to LA.

I'm taking steps. Watch me take steps.

And then, Tuesday (tuesday, G?) -- surgery.

Could be worse. Mom'll feed me chipped ice and pudding. and I'll watch B5 on Dad's DVD player. And I'll have Hawkeye and Edith.

And somewhere, in there, the kernels of this post-War Without End AU, with Delenn, and Sheridan, and Lennier, and this weird sort of mislaid love that stands between reality and victory. (but only if you fake it.)

And if I were Lennier -- yeah, maybe I'd have done it too. joined the Rangers. betrayed them all. Because where is this peace they kept advertising? this "terrible, terrible price"? Or was it just an excuse, like every other excuse, to bring together the One who Is and the One Who Will Be?

or is that what the war was about?

(anyway, while I was waiting, I wrote this. first attempt at making sense of Lennier. Because, you know, Bill Mumy has the same birthday as I do.)

I found my first shrink in LA over the phone, because my notes -- in the margin, next to the list of all the Jewish women in Beverly Hills (made that from my insurance book) -- I'd written, "strange accent. Sounds like Delenn."