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If there is one thing we can count on Darren Nichols for, it is this:

(Which is what [my Darren fic] looks like when Wordled. Actually, it's the whole story; right there. Go Wordle! yerself!)

Deal with that!

title: And So Are You
author: Sabine //

iamsab
fandom: Slings & Arrows
pairings: Geoffrey/Darren
rating: pg; language, people!
length: 2628 words
acknowledgements: Punk M. and Bill S. did the hard parts; there were lots of hard parts.
summary: The Taming of the Shrew

Written for

kink_bingo, row five, column three: costumes

( kiss me, kate )

//

So here I am at Rite Aid getting some bottled water and plum-colored lipliner, and I go to check out, and who should be there right beside me poking through the batteries and lightbulbs but Zachary Quinto.

And with

akukorax in mind, I strolled up to him and said, "hey. My friend Rachel would kill me if I didn't get a picture. Is that okay?"

And he said, "sure, as long as you're in it too!"

( then we talked about Shakespeare and Spock )

Sometimes even *I* don't know what the fuck is up with me. But in times like these, I don't actually mind being a freak. It helps.

//

Despite real problems with the last four episodes of Doctor Who (the bit where it's just relying on one-liners and Tennant doing his Tennant things and quite possibly actually phoning it in -- though as I said several weeks ago I can't quite tell if it's the writers or Tennant bringing the emo scenery chewing) -- I loved "Midnight." Loved it! Here, mouse over the white for why: The Doctor! Finally realizing his life is CHEAP, and that people aren't always good, and that it is actually quite dangerous for him to travel without a companion, and, again, that he's just a mortal guy whose name, "I'm the Doctor!" can't save him anymore, here in S4. God, Rusty. How did it happen that you impressed me more than Moffet's (incredibly predictable, emo, though clever in concept) two parter?

Here this is a really good blogpost by some UK fanboy named Lawrence Miles who feels the same way I do about season 4.

Oh and since I haven't pimped her, Mary Ann Johnson is my fannish nemesis! except that we're really just fans coexiting in the same fanverse. Anyway, she's a TV critic and blogger who also thinks she'll run off with David Tennant some day... poke around. It's also syndicated at

flickfilosopher. Go say hi to Ms. Mary Ann. And let me know if you know her. As she's clearly one of us.

She just started posting fanfic to her blog. So far it's somethign something, part 3/?, that seems to involve the Doctor and an OFC with violet eyes....?

[Poll #1204664]

These were great prompts.

( Five Skulls Temperance Brennan Doesn't Bother Explaining, for thassalia )

--

( Five Drinks Hawkeye Pierce Shouldn't Have Drunk, for annakovsky )

/

Took a little break from New Burbage to bring you this G-rated story about sex that Punk and I wrote!

Authors:

runpunkrun and

iamsab
Fandom: Bones
Pairing: Booth/Bones
Rating: G
Disclaimer: It is unquestionably Bones' fault, except for any errors, which are probably Booth's fault instead. So if you find any, please point them out and we'll fix them.

Size: 2400 words

Summary: A book about sex.

(Bones, Booth, Books!)

I left the house today in the blazing heat, with every intention of going to the Y and jumping in the pool. And then I thought,

thassalia told me about that waterproof iPod shuffle, I should get one of THOSE and go swim.

So I went to Best Buy and bought a $49 shuffle, and took it to the Apple store at the Grove to get it outfitted. But in doing so learned that the WATERPROOFING costs $90, so altogether this endeavor was more expensive than I'd planned to go. But, Jason Bateman was standing behind me as I grilled the iPod guy about potentially outfitting my ZUNE for waterproofing and therefore saving me the trouble of moving all my music into iTunes. The Apple guy was expectedly miffed when I told him that I liked the Zune better than the iPod (three words: Drag. And. Drop.) but also empathized with the absurd cost of the waterproofing kit, and I left. I didn't say hi to Jason Bateman, but it's a good thing too, because odds are what would have come out of my mouth would have sounded a lot like, "so, you're a celebrity. Help me figure out how to bag David Tennant?"

And that's just not cool, in the Apple store!

So instead, deciding to return the iPod shuffle and save myself a hundred and fifty dollar swimming headset, and also the trouble of having to move everything into iTunes.

I took my shoes off layway, and as I was headed home thought, you know what I need to do today instead of spending money on iEquipment I will hate to use?

( I need to get my armband tattoo fixed!/photos blurrily taken on my computer cam )

I had a crappy sort of bamboo band up around that arm, and went in to my guy and said "fix it!" and he brainstormed the city skyline (Brooklyn, in my head). It's got little houses and apartments with chimneys and vents and telephone poles! Above there are four blue-backgrounded floating stars, which I made him add. Better pictures to come when better pictures exist.

//

My personality type: the groundbreaking thinker. Take the free iPersonic personality test!

For those of you who know me well, and my perverse yet comprehensive predictions for David Tennant and his career and celebrity, and also my theories on how he's a player and therefore will marry me, someday after I meet him at Hamlet -- here's a really, really good article, from none other than the Daily Mail.

( entire article behind cut, also link )

See what I did there? See how the stars are, wossname? Aligning?

Turns out I might wanna throttle this guy too, but in the way where we live happily ever after, at the end.

I think an international, part-time girlfriend who's willing to chew him out is just what the bloke needs. I think Georgia Moffett will fall off the radar as soon as the summer starts and Hamlet becomes Tennant's OTP.

Later: Just how hammy IS DW Season 4? Or, is Tennant finally starting to phone it in? Only the shadow knows, because no one else would dare challenge this guy on his performance of his self-developed character.

I'm distracting myself from David Tennant for the duration until I hop the pond at the end of July. Fortunately my fannish yen for obsession has been fed by Paul Gross. I'm obsessing hard, but in a really exciting non-proprietary way where you all totally got to him before me and he's ALL YOURS, except that I briefly want to beat the crap out of him for being such a talented, brilliant, arrogant, ego-centric fuck. Possibly beat the crap out of him and fuck him at the same time. Actually, I did that a couple days ago.

So, I have questions.

First off, what's the deal with PG's political involvement? Does he really represent the conservative party? Or only as far as Canadian nationalism? Did he actually consider running for office? And, more recently but sort of unrelatedly, how's that fight for arts funding going? I take no small amount of humor from the fact that Tennant (comma David) is doing exactly the same thing in Scotland for arts education.

Second, rec me (and link me to?) some interviews with PG? I mean, print mag interviews but also any video. How about reviews of his stage productions?

Third, is there footage of any of his stage performances?

Fourth, what sort of music can I find aside from "Kiss You Till You Weep" (oh, so magnificently cheesy and yet triumphant)?

Those are my questions. And I still want to throttle that arrogant fuck, slam him into the floor and tell him what a gorgeous, obnoxious, absurdly talented fucking bastard he is. Somehow, Paul Gross is just the kind of guy I wanna fight. Hard.

In other news, faced with zombies in a mall I would wield an axe to the tune of "Rhapsody in Blue" (excellent zombie-fighting music!) with Seeley Booth at my side. Does Booth get a gun? I mean, does that count as my weapon if Booth has one? I like the one-two axe-handgun combo. BAM! Bada dada dada DUM DUM DUM DUM, DUM DUM DUM, DUM DUM DUM, DUM DUM doo DOO!

\o/

title: The Quality of Mercy
author: Sabine //

iamsab
fandom: Slings & Arrows
pairings: Geoffrey/Ellen
rating: nc-17
length: 3761 words
acknowledgements: praise be to Punk, who helped figure the whole damned thing out and even let me get away with hair-pulling.
summary: The Merchant of Venice

Written for

kink_bingo, row five, column two: biting/bruising

( my pound of flesh )

//

That sequence in the Slings & Arrows pilot, when Oliver calls Geoffrey from the pay phone and Geoffrey hangs up and Oliver calls again and they fight, and they confess everything, right there, and right before Oliver gets the answer to the question he's afraid to ask, he hangs up on Geoffrey. You know that one? Yeah. Just fucking broke me.

"You were incandescent," Oliver says. "Why did you leave?"

I mean, it's brilliant, it's always been brilliant, all ninety-thousand times I've seen this episode, and yet fucking Christ it just all came together so well. From the moment Oliver stumbles drunkenly into the phone booth to the moment he falls miserably out to his demise, it's perfect. I mean, it's perfect, a perfect piece of television.

"I'm proud of you," Oliver says. And he means it. "Chaining yourself to a building, defending the rights of the insane to put on shows nobody will ever see."

Over the last three weeks, give or take, I've driven myself to a gravelly laryngitic drawl, but for

amplificathon, it was totally worth it. Here's what I brought to the party.

( fics on tape )

We've got like forty-eight hours -- less, actually -- before the close of

amplificathon. So in the interest of blitzkrieg, here's a quick tutorial so those of you who want to get one in under the wire can podfic.

( Audacity tutorial, free and easy for everyone! )

I'm fairly sure I didn't cover everything, and left out some important parts. I'm happy to answer questions -- I'll be here all day, tip your waiters -- in the interest of LOTS of DIVERSE podfic for posterity. And if I get a vote, I say, MORE NCIS! More Torchwood that's not Jack/Ianto! More Doctor Who, on principle! More small fandoms! More MASH, please! Sitcoms! The Office! Bones!

The deadline is midnight tomorrow, for individual values of "midnight" and "tomorrow." Based on the curvature of the globe, my deadline here in California is 3am, night of the 2nd/morning of the 3rd. There's a sched on the ficathon LJ that explains it, with math!

And then thank

anatsuno,

chr0me_kitten, and

general_jinjur, and while you're at it, go visit the audiofic archive, browse around, and listen to some stuff!

Don't forget to leave feedback, for the author of the fic as well as the reader, if you like what you've heard. It makes the world, such as it is here on the series of tubes, go round!

//

HI, LA people and other people, UM, UNIVERSAL is on FIRE. The video vaults were lost. This is crazy.

Propeller mag has a slideshow of the sexiest men of 2008. It includes, oh, Ethan Hawke, 50 Cent, Hayden Christenson, Hugh Grant, Joseph Fiennes, Harrison Ford, everyone you'd think and about thirty more giant surprises (Jerry O'Connell? Really?). I tracked some of the fannish ones just to, you know, gauge hotness and popularity. Read on!

95. Elijah Wood
93. John Simm
85. Alan Rickman
78. Jamie Bamber
76. Robert Downey, Jr.
66. Jeffrey Dean Morgan
49. Matthew Fox
42. Clive Owen
38. Ewan McGregor
29. Hugh Jackman
25. David Boreanaz
21. George Clooney
16. Orlando Bloom

( aaaaaand, the top ten hottest men of 2008 are! )

Now it's time for me to wander waaaaaaay back to the end of the queue. And weep. Relentlessly. Till it's 2009.

//

title: Unreal Mockery
author: Sabine //

iamsab
fandom: Slings & Arrows
pairings: Geoffrey/Oliver, Geoffrey/Ellen
rating: r
length: 3319 words
acknowledgements: fixed by Punk.
summary: The Scottish King Play

Written for

kink_bingo, row five, column one: teasing

( this must be what being in hell feels like )

Title: Written by the Victors [story link]
Author/Reader:

iamsab
Fandom: NCIS
Pairing: Ziva/Jenny, Ziva/Tony, Gibbs/Jenny, Gibbs/Tony
Rating: Up to and including NC-17
Length: 15 mb // 16:55 mp3
Score: 5+1+2+3*4 = 20
Link: Written by the Victors (MU)

This was written for the

femslash100 alphabet soup challenge; twenty-six interconnected drabbles.

It is not, however, the renowned SGA fic of the same name.

Oh, but if you see one Sab podfic this year, see this one! I do like four voices with varying degress of success!

Absurdly, too-hot-to-wear-pants, video of David Tennant kissing various people and having sex and an oral fetish, by me4AJnD to "OMG": http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6FU0QwHqXO0

Oh god. *fans self*

And while I'm on it, the vid

elishamarie28 made for me for Sweet-Charity, a rollicking triumphant Tenth Doctor story to a techno remix of "Ode to Joy": http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JE_l7ngW6No

And since I'm going to tag this post for my Tennant vids reel, I should also throw in the one I made, namely, Casanova, to "Us:" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dSPRCNEPNRc

*exhales*
*goes back to recording podfic instead*

HEY ALSO, was there new Top Chef last night? I'm afraid I'm already spoiled for it! Despite knowing obviously who the final 4 -- and prob the final 3 -- will be... still! Anyone seen it anywhere?